Monthly Archives: July 2023

Last Saturday, I spent the day packing, cooking, and preparing, because on Sunday, we left for a week at Family Camp!! This is our second year as family campers and it continues to be my FAVORITE week of the year! It took some work to get us ready, but it was worth it. When people ask me “how was it?” my genuine answer has been, “you know that question, if you found out you had one week to live, how would you spend it?” I would spend it at Family Camp. It was SUCH an amazing week.

Check in was on Sunday, so we loaded up the van and kissed the puppies goodbye (Nanny Shyanna stayed with them for the week), and were on the road by 11am. We arrived for 3pm check in, unloaded the van (transferred food from the cooler into the refrigerator, made the beds, hung up the organizers, unpacked) and were settled in and on the beach by 3:30. Our cabin had 2 bedrooms, a bathroom, a tiny living/dining/kitchen and a nice deck that was as close to the beach and the main stage area as possible. Ideal. I love convenience more than anything.

The boys made friends with a family of 3 boys right away and they all played together the whole week. We had perfect weather all week. The weather at home was over 100 degrees and apparently there were “excessive heat warnings” several days. It was hot at camp, but not that hot! We were on the beach for a few hours and then it was time for dinner at our cabin and then opening ceremony.

Opening ceremony is a fun mix of skits, camp songs, highlights of the week ahead and meeting the counselors. Last year, the boys were too cool for camp songs, but this year, they were both with me, singing loud, doing the actions and being excited. I sometimes catch myself being WAY too excited about certain songs and try to tone it down, but I LOVE camp songs. Nate, to his credit, is not a big camp song guy, but he sang along too.

Monday morning, we started the day with Big and Little Dippers, which is the 7:30am plunge into the lake. If you do it every day, you get a tee shirt. Xander was obsessed last year and at 6am, he was up and ready to go. Gussie had big plans to join us this year, but was not interested when Monday morning rolled around.

The morning opening starts at 9:30, where we sang songs, watched a counselor skit (Xander’s favorite part), listened to announcements and then the kids go off to age groups. 0-3, 4/5, 6/7, 8/9, 10-12, 14-18 are the groups. I requested the Gussie move up to 6/7 since his birthday is in a few weeks anyway. Also, those 4/5 year olds were TINY! Also, Xander does better when his brother is with him. For 2.5 glorious hours, the kids hung out and did fun activities and Nate and I got to relax. I love my children, but I also wish age group time was 5 hours long. Nate and I played a lot of Scrabble an Yahzee, relaxed, talked and had a week of quality time that we really needed. July was a stressful month for me. As someone who’s job is not normally stressful, I will admit I don’t handle it particularly well when the pressure is on. So it was nice to have time to enjoy each other’s company, laugh, hold hands, and just be together.

At noon, we would pick up the kids each day and eat lunch, and then in the afternoons, we had time for family fun. On Monday, the boys and I went to the art barn for ceramics class. Afterwards, all of us headed to the big field for all-family kickball, then we went to the beach to cool down and swim.

I was surprised at the opening ceremony by a familiar face who came up to say hi. Katie Lowe hired me at the Y in 2004, taught me everything I know professionally and is someone I hold in the highest regard. I was a board member for her at the West St. Paul Y for several years. She has always been my first call for advice. She is someone who I admire and aspire to be like. She has supported me at CYC trivia nights every year and I can’t speak highly enough about her. Her husband Dave is a volunteer with YIG and one of the nicest people I know. I was thrilled that they were at family camp the same week!

Their boys are 11 and 12, but it just so happens that every friend Augustus made during the week was a 12 year old boy, Henry being one of his favorites. So even though their was an age difference, they were all buds. On Monday night, they were all swimming and having so much fun. Our cabin was literally 10 feet from the beach. I had brought burgers and buns from Costco and I insisted they eat with us that night. We dragged the boys in from the water- they scarfed down burgers, fries, chips and fruit, and then their boys took our boys to get ice cream while all of us had glasses of wine. The kids swam until 8pm that night (and probably could have gone longer if we hadn’t insisted they come in!)

It was a perfect first day!

Tuesday morning started with Big and Little Dippers, this time Augustus joining in the fun. Luckily it isn’t as strict as Xander would have made you believe and the counselor in charge told Gussie he could make up for the first day if he came all 4 days in a row and also jumped in twice one day.

Our Tuesday was a little more low-key than Monday. 12 solid hours of intense outdoor activity was a strong start to our week, but also, the boys were more tired on Tuesday. They enjoyed a beach day with their age group, Nate and Xander joined in the all-camp beach volleyball game, we played lots of board games and swam on and off all day. There were raspberry bushes everywhere and I was obsessed with picking them. We put them in yogurt, in pancakes, and mixed them with other fruit. It was so fun.

We put the boys to bed a little earlier Tuesday night and they went right to sleep!

On Wednesday, me and the boys started with the dip and Xander basically swam until it was time for opening. During age groups, Nate and I hung out with Katie and Dave for a while. After lunch, we swam and then Xander took me and Gussie on a paddleboard ride. He paddled us all the way to the other side of camp to the other beach. Nate followed in a kayak in case he needed to rescue us. Xander was a strong paddler and quite proud of himself. On the way back, Augustus held onto the back of Nate’s kayak and got towed home. It was a highlight for him!

Wednesday night was the camp talent show. Nate took Augustus back to our cabin about halfway through (he was falling asleep on my lap), but Xander and I stayed and enjoyed it! Xander even got up and told a joke! He was very proud of himself.

Nate and I stayed up until midnight talking and laughing and playing games. There was a rainstorm overnight which cooled the weather down a bit (it had been VERY HOT the first 2 days). The thing about family camp that I love so much is that it is a perfect blend of activity and relaxing. There are scheduled activities morning-evening and you opt into whatever you want to do. But there’s also no pressure, so if you just want to read a book on the beach, that’s cool too. It is such a great balance and I loved the time together and also the time apart.

Thursday was a chilly morning to dip, but we did it! Afterwards, Xander and I took a paddleboard out and paddled all the way around a nearby island (which was farther and bigger than it looked!). The lake was like glass and it was so lovely. Xander paddled almost the entire time and he was just so proud and so cute and I can’t believe how big my baby is getting.

It was a glorious day that was warm and sunny, but just a hint of coolness that we needed. After age groups, before lunch, the Lowe family came over for a pre-lunch jello party (because… family camp). We ate lunch and then the boys and I went to the art barn to tie dye tee shirts. We spent the rest of the afternoon/evening at the beach.

Thursday night was “good neighbor night” which is an annual event I was excited for. Last year, we missed it because that was the night we had scheduled a sunset pontoon cruise. The kids went with their age groups for some fun activities and the adults enjoyed music trivia and a silent auction. We drank wine and listened to music clips to identify the artist and song title (so much harder than you think it is going to be!) It was a blast. Our team wasn’t the best, but we also weren’t the worst!

Friday was our last full day and it was a great day. We dipped (and earned our shirts!). The boys went to age groups. After lunch was the Counselor Hunt, which the boys LOVED last year and were very excited for. The counselors hide around camp and the kids have to chase them down and tag them and bring them back to the “jail”. Nate and I relaxed on beach chairs and it was glorious. After the intense running, everyone headed for the lake for all-camp water games.

For their age-group skit, Xander was going to play a camp counselor. He was obsessed with the idea of hanging his OWN lanyard, not just borrowing one from a counselor. I asked at the camp store, but they are not an item that is sold. However, I happen to know the camp director, who was there when I inquired… guess what? They had a whole bin of extras (and blank name tags) and he offered to give me one (and then 2 when I clarified that Gussie didn’t actually want one, but would be jealous if X got one).

I wish I had a video of Xander’s reaction to his brand new lanyard. Sometimes, it is like looking in a mirror- that kid is a younger Natalie King…

After dinner, was the closing ceremony. Each age group performed a skit or a song. They all did a great job and it was fun and cute and I couldn’t believe how fast the week went.

After closing, we had 2 very tired boys. Gussie was MELTING down about taking a shower. In a moment of insanity, I said, “do you want to go swimming with your friends instead?” because yes, a group of 12 year old boys were out on the trampoline swimming. And of course, he said yes. So instead of putting him to bed, we let our not yet 6 year old go out to swim with a group of 12 year olds. Gussie is funny, confident, fearless, tough, and somehow manages to fit in with older kids. He is just as daring, just as mischievous and he keeps up. I think he’s going to give us a run for our money when he’s a little older… but for now, I was ok with him swimming until sunset.

Saturday was a day to model our Big/Little Dipper tee shirts and then a whirlwind of packing and cleaning and loading the van. Nate and the boys were hard workers and then got kicked out at the very end to go to the playground while I finished up. I got our cabin looking spotless while Nate packed the van like a professional. We are a great team! The boys were EXHAUSTED.

We got home and unloaded the van, kissed the puppies a million times and got everything unpacked within a few minutes. The boys were excited to have ipads and video games again, and they needed an afternoon to rest. I managed to wash and put away 6 loads of laundry over the course of the evening. The boys were SO crabby and we were sure they would fall right to sleep, so after dinner and showers, we put them in bed at 6:30. They did not fall right to sleep. Instead, they both got onto the top bunk and proceeded to talk and giggle for 2 hours. It was incredibly cute and also a huge surprise (they had been at each other’s throats at dinner). They didn’t fall asleep until 8:30!

It is Sunday today and our glorious fun relaxing week is over. I got up bright and early to meet Danny and Heather for swimming and biking. A week of ice cream and laying on the beach made today a brutal jump back into reality!

The boys had the option to stay home or to go to Grandma’s house- not at all a surprise they chose Grandma. They spent a long time in the pool- she said she couldn’t get them out!

My mom has pickle ball paddles and her condo has pickle ball courts, and Nate suggested we play today. So we went early to pick up the boys and played. Nate whooped me (he was quick to point out that 20 years ago, he went to state in tennis, so….) but even losing, I had a lot of fun. When we got home, Kelly happened to be organizing neighborhood pickle ball for tonight. Count us in!

The boys played with Sam and Abby until dinner and then we joined Kelly, Silas, Aaron, Melissa, and Sean for pickle ball in the park.

We’re ready for a normal week ahead.

I can’t say this with enough enthusiasm, this was the most normal, boring, average week. It was fabulous!

The boys spent a lot of time playing with Sam and Abby, a lot of time looking through pokemon cards, and played outside nonstop.

On Tuesday, my co-worker Monica and I road tripped to Camp Warren for the day for the YMCA Camp Summit. It was a long day but we learned a lot and it was fun to be at a camp. Nanny Shyanna took the boys to several parks and the library. We fell behind on our kiwi kit boxes for the last few months, but I knew we would want them this summer. And I was right! They were very busy with them this week and it was super fun to have some good projects! We swam. We played. It was a really nice summer week.

On Wednesday, the boys had golf lessons and a dentist appointment. Lots of playing. And another park with Nanny Shyanna.

Thursday we had an afternoon playdate with their new school and then it was soccer in the evening. It was the second to last game, but we are missing next week, so it was actually our last soccer game of the season. After skipping soccer for a few weeks, Xander was back in action, and he was basically a different kid. He was confident, assertive and was going after the ball! He scored 6 goals! It was unbelievable!

Xander is obsessed with the idea of “having big muscles like Uncle Danny” and has been begging to go to the YMCA to lift weights. So on Friday, Nanny Shyanna and Gussie went to get ice cream and Xander and I went to work out. He was very excited and very impressed with his muscles at the end of the workout.

As a reward to myself for finishing the magazine, I got my nails done. I am very excited to have such fancy nails!

We had family/puppy playtime for a long time on Friday night and both boys and dogs ended up very tired after nearly an hour of “chase”.

Saturday has been a full day of fun! Nate and the boys joined Sam and Abby, Kelly and Silas at the driving range to hit some balls. Afterwards, they went to the brand new Highland Park Bridge playground (just opened today!). Then it was home for more playtime, followed by a BBQ dinner with everyone (plus Aaron and Melissa). You know we love a good neighborhood get together.

While Nate and the boys were busy playing all day, I spent the day cooking, packing, cleaning, and getting ready for the week.

I love an average, boring, easy week!

Nanny Shyanna is back! I had front loaded the boys’ summer schedule with camps, and then I panicked because what nanny would want to miss the first month of work? I was THRILLED to find out that she had a class the first month and so our schedules matched perfectly! Not only is she great with the boys, she is also great with the dogs, and she loves crafting and doesn’t hesitate to help me with ridiculous projects (other duties as assigned!).

Monday she arrived and Xander was feeling very put out. I mean, he’s 7, obviously too old for a nanny! Gussie sometimes matches Xander’s energy, and so he was feeling angsty too. I’m not proud of myself, but I bribed them. I said if they were well behaved and helpful and had good attitudes all week, they could pick a prize on Friday. I’m not winning any parenting awards, but oh my goodness did they turn it around quickly.

They played games all morning and at one point I heard Gussie say, “I told Daddy you were annoying, you’re not!” Kind of a compliment…. I guess. But progress from where the morning started.

In the afternoon, Shyanna took them to Madison’s Place, which is a HUGE park and splash pad. Xander came back and reported, “a splash pad is just cement”… yeah, with like, a lot of fun water features, sometimes he is 7 going on 17. But overall, day 1 with the nanny was smooth.

Tuesday afternoon was “water and registration day” for the boys’ new school. I filled out paperwork while they played with bubbles, sponges, kiddie pools and a bunch of fun water stuff set up. Xander wasn’t thrilled, but Gussie made “16 new friends”.

Wednesday morning, the boys had golf lessons and then it was a full day of playing with Sam and Abby. Wednesday is also the day of the fistfight… that story is to be continued below. And for the record, my boys scuffle a lot- it’s not even real fighting. They hit or push or “fight” but it’s pretty minimal. They are relatively similar in size and 100% equal in switching off who instigates it. And they usually get over it within 5 minutes, so I try not to intervene too much. This was a first…. see below for the full report.

Thursday is going to be Grandma Debbie’s day for the rest of the summer, and so they were busy with swimming, pickle balling, playing outside. In the evening, Nate took the boys to soccer- Xander was back to wanting to play and they had a great time, despite losing 20-5. My mom and I went to the History Theater, which I had never heard of, to see a play called Glensheen (about the Glensheen mansion and murders). I like theater and would pretty much see anything, but I wasn’t expecting too much from such a small theater. Surprise, it was FANTASTIC. The music was great, the actors were amazing, it was funny, it was interesting. 10/10. So fun.

On Friday, Nanny Shyanna was back. Our cleaning lady came in the afternoon, so they all had to get out of the house, so they went to Matthew’s Park wading pool and playground. I had a meeting to discuss the next steps of the alumni magazine with the design team. Yes, we’re on to phase 2 (or phase 27, depending on how you are counting). I am DONE writing. It took 4 months but the magazine is WRITTEN. Lord have mercy, when I said, “hey, I think I should be the writer” that was ambitious. But I did it and I’m super happy with it and I am so excited to see the designer turn everything into a beautifully laid out magazine.

On Saturday, I spent the morning at Camp St. Croix for an alumni event. It was beautiful weather, a great turn out, I got to talk to alumni from the 1950s-2020s. Success. The boys went to Grandma’s and played pickle ball, went swimming and were going to spend the night, but when I got home at 2, my mom called to say that Gussie had been crying on and off all day. That is pretty out of character for him, so we both suspected something was going on. I went to pick him up and we agreed that everyone sometimes has a bad day and it’s no big deal. When that happens, sometimes you just need to snuggle with your mom on the couch for a while. He perked up as soon as we agreed on that plan and he was in good spirits as soon as we got home.

Last time they were going to spend the night, the reverse happened, and Xander came home. I actually think it is nice for them each to have one on one time with grandma, and have one on one time with mom and dad, so it worked out. We ordered dinner with our neighbors and ate outside in their backyard. It was a nice night.

Ok, back to Wednesday, buckle up, this is a story…

Wednesday mid morning, I could hear sobbing coming from Xander’s room. When I finally got him to calm down, he let me know that several days ago, he traded a pokemon card to Sam and now he regrets it and he’s sad because Grandma gave him that card for his birthday. Ok.

Sam, Abby, Xander and Augustus all have books of pokemon cards and they love trading. So we walked down to Sam and Abby’s house, and Kelly, Shyanna and I tried to negotiate a terrorist-level situation between 7 year olds. We suggested not trading anymore, which none of them liked, but also, we got no where in the discussion and Xander was getting more and more upset, so we agreed to all think on it until 4pm.

Shyanna and Kelly took the kids to the library and the park and it was pleasant and they were thinking it had all blown over, until Kelly overheard them say something about pokemon and Xander said, “I’m going to have to sleep on that” so, no, they hadn’t moved on.

We missed the 4pm meet up, but after dinner, we went back to their house to revisit the problem. Sam and Abby were on the trampoline and Augustus joined in right away. Xander stood outside the trampoline and attempted to have a reasonable conversation about his feelings while the other 3 bounced. I eventually pulled him away and said, “I think the timing isn’t great, let’s wait until there’s a better time. Can you just play right now?” And so he got into the trampoline to join in the fun.

Kelly and I were busy patting ourselves on the backs for being such good moms who refuse to helicopter and just solve this for them- we are facilitating conversation and allowing them to problem solve. We are building strong, resourceful kids. We were smiling at each other. We were beaming with pride. And then I watched Xander reach back and do a full on “soap opera level” slap across Sam’s face and he reacts instantly with a good whack. Kelly and I leapt into the air rushing to the trampoline both yelling, “whoa whoa”. The boys were each sitting in their respective corners of the trampoline. Abby had fully embraced Sam as if he is a dying soldier on a battlefield. She was gently stroking his head. Gussie had managed to wrap his legs around Xander in a wrestling move and was lovingly jabbing him in the ribs (as soothing as I think he could be).

And then Sam boldly stated, “Abby is the ONLY funny person here” and Xander aggressively replied, “Gussie is the ONLY funny person here” (no idea what that meant) and then both boys burst into tears.

I got Xander out of the trampoline and he and I walked home to cool down. Xander was furious. “Sam is the worst person I know! I will NEVER play with him again!”

20 minutes later, we’d cooled down and were ready to go back over, as long as pokemon was NOT mentioned. When we got back to their house, Sam, Abby and Gussie have gotten a tee shirt stuck on the string of porch lights and were jumping off a table to attempt to retrieve it. Xander joined in immediately (is there a better activity?!) They got the shirt down and were joyously celebrating.

We told them they couldn’t do that anymore because they were going to rip down the lights, so they moved to the front yard to try to throw their shoes and shirts into the tree, celebrating when they get each one stuck. All 4 kids were shirtless and running around like the ferrell children they are- all of them smiling and happy.

End scene.

Thursday the boys were at Grandma Debbie’s and on Friday, Sam and Abby went out of town for the weekend, so having a break for a few days was probably the best thing for all of them.

Sunday has been a busy day for all of us. Grandma Debbie and Xander were busy with pickle ball and shopping. Nate and Gussie hung out all morning. I went with Danny to do another open water swim and 7 mile bike ride. Afterwards, I went to the CYC office to be in charge of camp check in. I have been enjoying a camp free life, but you know I can’t stay away. When they didn’t have someone available for check in, the ED called me to ask if I would step in. And so I was busy running rosters and printing reports and getting all the paperwork ready. There were several campers and parents I recognized and the routine was the same as always. It was fun to step in for a little while and also nice to say, “ok, bye, back to my family and a lazy Sunday!”

After check in, I went to meet Nate and Gussie at Grandma Debbie’s house. Grandma and Xander had challenged us all to a pickleball game and we were ready! After that, the boys headed home to play with Sam and Abby, I went grocery shopping, and we had a relaxing Sunday afternoon/evening of fun.

Onto another week of summer!

After a ridiculously fun Sunday at the lake, Monday was supposed to be back to work for me. But when Michelle and Jason suggested we all return to the lake on Monday, my first instinct was to clutch my pearls and say absolutely not. I had a lot of work to do, a personal training appointment, and our cleaning lady was supposed to come. The house was in shambles- not ready to be cleaned. But originally, when I planned the summer, I had set this week aside for family fun. I took several days off. I figured after 3 weeks of programming, the boys would be ready for some down time and family fun.

So instead of working all day (which I desperately needed to do), the boys and I headed back to the lake!

We spent the first part of the day at the lake- more jumping off the boat for all of us. The water was so nice. Jason and his son Sawyer were such good sports and wrestled with the boys the whole time we were on the water. Augustus wants to wrestle 95% of his life, so he was thrilled to have people to repeatedly toss him into the lake (and let him toss them in as well).

We could have stayed all day- it was so fun, but I knew if the evening was going to work that the boys needed to have plenty of rest time. We got home around 2pm and the boys relaxed in front of screens. I worked for about 2 hours and then we had dinner and got ready for the baseball game.

A July 3rd Miracle

Let’s just be clear, when you get 15 people together (4 families, 7 children- 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 8 years old), someone is always bound to get sick at the last minute or have to bail. The fact that everyone was even available in the first place was a surprise. Anna and Jake (with Paul and Jo) were seated when we arrived. After we got there, Ryan and Jamie and Odin came. And then Sarah, Grayson, Oliver and Elliot came down. It was genuinely exciting to have everyone arrive and fill in our entire first row of seats.

When we arrived, it was approximately 900 degrees and the plastic seats were literally radiating heat. It was 6pm, so I was hopeful that it would start to cool down, but it was intense when we first sat down. The game hadn’t even started when Xander said he wanted a snack and Augustus said he wanted to go to the playground and I was like, “oh buddy, it’s gonna be a long night.” But once we got some ice cream we all settled in and it was hot, but we were managing.

Around the second inning, the sky got dark and the temperature dropped about 10 degrees. Uh oh. It started sprinkling and honestly, it was a relief from the heat. When the sprinkle turned into giant fat blobs of water, most of the stadium ran for cover. But the Saints stadium has very little cover. I don’t know why we joined the crowd, but by the time we got up there, it was a mob scene and it wasn’t possible to get under the cover. Xander was beside himself and demanding we leave. A nice woman offered to let him stand under her blanket, at which point, I was like, “duh”. I had brought a picnic blanket (with plastic backing, it was essentially a tarp) so we went back to our seats and huddled underneath the blanket and it worked great and was also sort of a magical moment.

As quickly as the rain had begun, 10 minutes later, it stopped. Just like that. The crew was busy drying off the field and the weather was gorgeous and a giant rainbow came out. The game resumed and life was good and the weather was no longer suffocatingly hot.

The rain had stopped, but the sky was filled with an intense amount of lightning. The lifeguard in me was very concerned and really wanted to evacuate. But I reasoned that the Saints were not going to put the players or the crowd of people in danger. I trusted that they had good radar telling them that the lightning was far enough away to not be dangerous. But it was a show in itself.

The boys ate hot dogs, and watched the game. I took Gussie to the playground for a while. Xander went from angsty, to totally into the game. It was wonderful. When the game ended, everyone went onto the field, which is what the boys had been asking about since we arrived. We spread out blankets and hung out to wait for the fireworks.

The 7 young children sat together happily, chatting and laughing. No one melted down. No one needed to be redirected. No one whined. No one fought with each other. No one needed to potty at an inopportune time. Literal perfect behavior, happy, pleasant, just hanging out, sitting nicely. The adults sat together having beers and chatting happily. The weather was perfect. There were no bugs. This was the scene that EVERY parent dreams of when you plan family fun. It is a scene you see on a movie and think, “yeah right!” It was a miracle. It was glorious. It was rare and beautiful and for the rest of my life, I will plan family fun with that night in mind.

The fireworks were directly over the field. They were spectacular and gorgeous and loud and the kids were mesmerized. It was magic. When it ended at 10:40, all of the kids (let me just repeat, these were 3-8 year olds) were still happy and well behaved. We had found rockstar parking just a very short walk away and so said our goodbyes and got in the van, and the kids were in bed by 11:30 (4 hours later than their usual bedtime). Perfection.

Fourth of July was on Tuesday and we had 2 tired boys. Both Nate and I were supposed to be off, but both of us needed to work. He went into the office for a while and I worked like a crazy woman. The boys had a lot of screen time on Tuesday, and went to bed EARLY (Gussie at 6:30, Xander at 7).

Wednesday was another intense day of writing and working on the magazine for me. Nate took the boys to the Science Museum and had so much fun. I was jealous they got to have a family fun day and I had to miss out, but I was also grateful for a long day to make major progress on this project.

On Thursday the boys spent the day with Grandma Debbie. They were at the Shoreview Community Center basically the entire day. They played inside, outside, swam, ate pizza, swam some more. What a day!

Friday was the due date that I have been working towards for MONTHS. When I was hired, my boss told me he wanted a camp alumni magazine. Ok, cool. Not qualified for that at all. We published the first one in January. We’re not even calling it the first edition- we’re calling it the pilot. I learned a lot. I let the marketing department take the lead and it was good. It turned out a little more like a brochure than a magazine, but it went to 18,000 people and it was good enough to move on to the next round.

This time around, I asked if I could be the writer (last time we had a contract writer). My boss said yes and over the past 4 months, I’ve done about 35 interviews (of those interviews 29 people have cried- I’m calling myself the Oprah of the Y). Each of the 8 overnight camps gets a feature article. I had planned to dance in the streets and yell from the rooftops on Friday night… but at the last minute, I decided that one of my articles was boring. I needed a few more interviews and I wanted to start over. My boss was supportive- he wants interesting stories. So everything else- stories, dozens of photos, every photo caption, even the page numbers- I submitted all of it. No dancing and yelling, but I was satisfied and happy I decided to redo the article.

The boys played with Sam and Abby in the morning and then Grandma Debbie came over and took the boys to the park and entertained them while I worked in the afternoon.

Saturday morning was relaxed and slow- the boys took it easy and I went to brunch with a friend. When I got home, Xander and I went for a run. We swam. We played some board games as a family. We did some family clean up. We had snack dinner on the couch with movie night!

2 weeks ago, Grandma Debbie gave Xander a journal. He decided that he needed an office to go with it. So he moved some things around in the spare room and took over the desk. The next day, he said, “I should probably just sleep in there, that way, when I wake up, I can go right to work.” I’m not sure when this child got a job, or what the nature of his work is, but I said, ok, let’s try it. Well Xander has gotten very excited about the idea of his own room. Nate and I are still on the fence about it, but we said we could try it out this summer. On Saturday, we moved a few of Xander’s things downstairs and he was very proud of his decorating.

Sunday has been another good day- I finished the final 2 interviews I needed for the magazine today. I went with Danny and Heather for another open water swim, followed by a 7 mile bike ride (you always have to be careful when agreeing to do “fun” things with them, because they are super human and think nothing of swimming .25 miles and then biking). But it was a really fun morning. Nate did a lot of yard work today and the yard looks amazing. The boys and I swam. We played more family board games. The weather was gorgeous and it was such a relaxing day.

We have a very regular schedule ahead this week and I am crossing my fingers that it will stay that way…

Oh man, what a week. The boys were signed up for a Y program called Summer Power. This was the third week of scheduled programming in a row, so I assumed that by the end of the week, they’d be burned out and ready for some home time. But I was excited about the program. We got an hour by hour schedule filled with activities, crafts, sports, swimming and a field trip every day. This was a different location than the first 2 weeks- closer to our house, so less driving. Awesome.

Monday was good. Nate did drop off and pick up, so I didn’t get to see anything, but Augustus had fun. His group went on a field trip to a really cool park. Xander came home saying he didn’t want to go back, but I wasn’t surprised. He and I took a walk after dinner and talked about it. I asked him if he was anxious about the field trip (because his group had walked across the street to the YMCA for swimming, so he hadn’t gotten on a bus yet) and he said he was. Xander has a tendency towards anxiety, so we talked about all of the safety procedures, the staff training and all of the behind the scenes details that 7 year olds don’t normally care about. He was very interested and was feeling really great about validating his feelings, listening to him and also convincing him to give it a try (because I thought it would be fun and because I had a ton of work to do).

On Tuesday, Nate dropped them off and I was disappointed when he texted to tell me Xander had a tough time and asked him to ask me to pick him up early. So much for my good talk. His field trip was scheduled to get back at 2, Augustus’s at 3:30, so I decided to go early to hang out with X and wait for Gussie together.

And that is where our week derailed.

When I arrived to the secure location, instead of putting in a door code, or being buzzed in by a staff member, a random child wandering by the door let me in. Um? Ok.

When I walked in, 4 staff looked at me and not one greeted me, asked me who I was there to pick up, directed me or asked me for my identification. Xander came over to me as I listened to one of the staff women YELL at the group of kids. Like, so aggressive, so over the top, I nearly stepped in. When she paused, I asked her what was going on and she proceeded to vent her frustrations about how bad the group was being. I bit my tongue. But I was getting progressively more frustrated and I had been there approximately 5 minutes at that point.

I watched several parents arrive to pick up kids. None of them was asked for ID (which is a standard practice at Y youth programs). When I saw that same yelling staff member take a child, just her and that child, into an office to call his mom, and close the door behind her (for those who don’t work in youth development, you are NEVER to be one on one with a child in an enclosed space, ever), that was when I was at my breaking point.

When the site director, who had been on the field trip with Gussie’s group arrived, I said, “I would like to see you in your office as soon as you are settled.” Poor Ryan didn’t know what hit him. I said, first of all, after we are done speaking, you need to go out there and send that young woman home, she is not safe to be with children. The second thing you are going to do is call your boss and let him know you need more support at this site, because what I have witnessed in the last 15 minutes is telling me that this site has some major safety red flags.

When he started to apologize, I told him, you don’t answer to me and this isn’t about my children, who will not be coming back. But I am going to call your boss and his boss and the executive director of the YMCA and so this is just the beginning of this conversation, because you have a problem with this site and it needs to be fixed.

I went through the safety issues and clear policy violations and then I wished him well and took my children home. I called his boss, emailed his boss’s boss, and the ED at the Y. I have some “karen” tendencies, but this wasn’t that my special snowflake didn’t like something or whatever. These were safety violations and after my long conversation with Xander about staff training, safety and policy, there was no question that this wasn’t going to work for us.

I love the Y and believe in Y programming and we’ve had nothing but good experiences so far. We are signed up for more programming later in the summer. I think this was a rough day, difficulty in staffing, multiple challenges all at once. I will send my kids back to the Y in the future. But we were done with that program.

On Wednesday, Nate took the boys to golf lessons in the morning and in the afternoon, they got unlimited screen time. I am working on a GIANT project and my deadline is July 6, so this whole week was PACKED. Grandma Debbie was gone Wednesday-Thursday, so it was ipads, computers, video games- whatever you want, I have to work.

Thursday morning, I had an in person meeting, so we packed up the ipads and computers, a giant pile of snacks, and headed to work. The boys were very good- they sat quietly for 3 hours. When we got home, I had SO MUCH WORK TO DO, and they were bored, sick of screens, arguing with each other and I was fighting for my life. I am typically pretty patient with them and I try hard not to yell, but I yelled, they yelled. I am also not a crier, so you know this week was rough as I burst into tears multiple times throughout the week.

My mom got home from up north on Thursday afternoon and came to my house to save my life. She kept the boys busy in the pool, and also managed to vacuum and clean my house, do my laundry, and give me time to work. Nate was golfing all day Thursday, so, ya know, he wasn’t able to offer any help. Luckily Grandma Debbie to the rescue.

Friday was another morning of screens, boys arguing/being sick of each other, me yelling, me trying to work. It wasn’t a good week. I will freely admit it. It was really hard. I felt like a failure as a mom every single day. I was drowning at work. My house was in shambles. It was not an easy week. I am not proud of how short on patience I was. I did my best, but I wanted to be better at all things and I fell short every day.

On Saturday, Grandma Debbie took the boys for the day and I worked from 9am-8pm with just a short break for dinner. By the end of the day, I had made MAJOR progress, but my eyes hurt, my body hurt from sitting without moving, and I was drained. It’s been a hard week, have I mentioned that yet? I was so grateful that the boys were with Grandma Debbie for a while.

The boys called midday to ask if they could spend the night at her house, but then Xander changed his mind later in the day, so Nate went to get him around dinner time. I think it was good for the boys to have some time apart, so it actually worked out pretty well.

Today has been a busy day of family fun. The house is still in shambles. I still have tons of work to do. But we all headed to my uncle’s cabin for the day and it was a great day. The weather was gorgeous. The boys got to swim, jet ski, wrestle with Uncle Danny and my cousin Jason, jump off the boat, drive the boat, and play all day. Danny and Heather took me on my first open water swim- very different than lap swimming at the Y! First Danny kayaked 200 yards out. Heather and I swam to him, but keeping my eye on him when my head came up for air was way harder than I expected. I didn’t exactly swim in a straight line to him, but did quite a ziz zag path. Swimming back to shore was slightly easier, although I was still zig zagging a big. Then Heather kayaked out, and I swam with Danny. It was really fun and I definitely want to do it again.

We ended up staying at the cabin until almost 7, which wasn’t my plan, but it was such a fun day, none of us wanted to leave.

Our week ahead is supposed to include some PTO (both me and Nate), but I still have a lot of work to do between now and July 6, so we’ll see how it ends up going. However, the end is in sight for my work insanity to end, so I just have to be survive a few more crazy days. At least this tough week is behind us and we can start fresh tomorrow!